Torn Threads
The footprints of her life have travelled many a journey - the most arduous of which has been the tangled webs of the torn threads of her family. But there was a time, not so long ago, when she never could have imagined being permanently estranged - being apart - from her siblings and their families. However, the events that had transpired within the past few years had caused irreversible damage. Throughout the turmoil she had tried with everything in her to maintain the sibling relationship, as all throughout her family existence she felt that adult siblings should have the ability to resolve conflicts and avoid estrangements by engaging in effective and reciprocal communication and by relying on the neutral bond of siblings. Thus, her many requests for reconnection and finally the issuing of an olive branch. But, unfortunately her attempts met constant rejection and the resulting estrangement has now destroyed an entire family. There is a great divide within the family unit. New parameters were issued. The ties were severed.
Sibling relationships were the longest threads in her life and the tug from those threads was what has brought her on her journey today. Today isn't the first time she has left her home in the darkness of the early morning 'wake-up'. Several times in the past two weeks she had reached the Go Train Station just as the sun had peeked through the clouds, but her emotions had got the better of her before the train arrived and she had slowly retraced her footsteps home.
Today, though, is different - today she will follow through on her journey to visit with her critically ill sister. The estrangement with her sisters had been the fuel that had burned her soul, but she had become whole again, after much hard work and soul searching. Fortunately life's lessons had given her the ability to survive the estrangement. She had learned how to stop conforming to her siblings model of who they thought she should be and how they thought she should live her life, and, through it all, she had discovered her true self - who she really was - liked who she saw in the mirror, and had finally found peace. She was no longer going to let fearful emotions destroy this peace. She realized, though, that she needed to weave her way through the tangled web and touch the family thread again - she needed to see her sister one more time.
They had reached their senior years. Time was running out like the sands in a draining hourglass. The barriers across the paths they had shared had not been removed. Although forgiveness and reconnection were no longer viable options for her, she still needed - wanted - to let her sister know that no matter the issues that had torn them apart, she is willing to put away the memories of the hurt, the rage, the resentment, the unstitched gashes - all the bad feelings - for this visit. She sincerely wants to wish her sister peace within her heart and mind and much strength throughout her physical recovery. She needs her to know that although life for herself and her sister has turned down a path that leads nowhere, the torn threads are just that - torn - but the actual family tie can never be broken.
And so she will enter the door to her sister's hospital room, reaching out one more time.....
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